Why Crescent Moon Characters Shouldn't Drink
by Kitsune no takai
Summary: Mitsuru got a bottle of alcohol. Nozomu and Akira drank it.
1. Chapter 1

Kit: This little fic is stupid! I know this and I don't care if you flame me, it wasn't meant to be taken seriously! If you flame then I will simply laugh at the fact that you have no life. This fic was slapped together for the sole purpose of getting a Crescent Moon category. I do have a better one I'm working on that will be posted as well. Enjoy the insanity.

Summary: Mitsuru gets a hold of some alcohol, what will happen?

Mitsuru looked swiftly around the room before holding up his prize, the bottle of alcohol he had stolen from the bar.

Akira and Nozomu sat near him and waited, "Are we going to drink this? Everyone in the bar who has some seems to like it so why shouldn't we?"

Nozomu popped Akira on the head, "They may like it but look how they act after they drink it! Do you want to act like a moron??"

Akira whimpered and shook his head as Mitsuru hushed them, "Whatever we do, we can't let Misoka or Oboro know about it. We'd get in big trouble and before you say it would just be me for taking it, you'll get in trouble for association and you both know it!"

Nozomu nodded, "Well then, since we have it, we might as well drink it. Give it here!" He grabbed the bottle, popped it open, and took several drinks.

Akira and Mitsuru stared at the vampire for several moments before he spook again, "Not bad, taste kinda nice." He fell back on the floor and giggled.

Akira looked at Nozomu and at the bottle, curiosity taking over and causing him to drink some as well. The affect was immediate, "Tasty 'hic'. You should 'hic' try some 'hic' Mitsuru."

Mitsuru shook his head, "And they call me an idiot at times but even I'm not dumb enough to get drunk. I'm going to be in so much trouble that I won't know what to do when I tell Oboro and Misoka."

The tengu eyed the vampire and werewolf as they both finished the bottle and began staggering around the room singing 99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall. Why they were singing that song, Mitsuru had no idea and hoped he wouldn't have to find out.

"Look you two, that is enough of the singing. You both should go to bed or something and leave me to think about how I'm going to explain this."

Akira sniffed slightly, "No worry Mitsuru. We tell story just fine."

Nozomu hiccupped and nodded, "Right, right. We can do 'hic' this just fine 'hic'."

Mitsuru shook his head, "You two can barely walk straight! How are you going to explain anything?? Tell me that and by all means you can go."

Akira didn't answer and began running around the room, stripping down to nothing and trying to fly. Mitsuru was quite sure by then that he didn't want to be around drunken people again.

"Akira, please stop running around like that! You're going to wake someone up!"

"What's going on in there!!?" Mitsuru froze at the sound of Oboro's voice.

Kit: That is all I'm writing for now! Stupid, isn't it?


	2. Chapter 2

Kit: All right, I'm writing more of this stupid fic. Review if you want, flame if you want but all you'll be doing if you flame is proving you have no life and giving me something to laugh at.

Mitsuru squeaked slightly and ran over to the door, "Nothings going on! Everything is fine!"

There was silence then, "Why does everyone in there sound insane? Are you sure nothings wrong in there?"

"Yes, very sure! Please go away!" Mitsuru glanced back just in time to see Akira attaching himself to the hanging fan and Nozomu turning it on.

Oboro sweatdropped slightly at the sounds coming from inside the room. He heard Mitsuru shriek suddenly, "Get down from there! I said down you stupid wolf!! No, wait don't.... CRASH OWWWW!!!! That hurt!"

Oboro stared at the door as he continued to listen to the three boys inside, "Mitsuru, me wan' more. Now!" Oboro blinked, was that Nozomu?

"No, you damn vampire, you can't have more! We're all going to be in enough trouble as it is, look at the mess you two made in this room!"

Akira, at least Oboro thought it was Akira, whimpered, "We no mean to. Jus' wanna have fun."

Oboro finally just shook his head and walked away, deciding that he really did not want to know anymore.

Mitsuru stared at the drunken, and very naked, werewolf that was staring at him pleadingly, "Akira, that is very disturbing. Go put your clothes back on."

Akira cocked his head to one side and then looked over at his clothes and back to Mitsuru again, "But it feels better without them."

The tengu choked and stared at the werewolf in shock, "I don't care! Just put the damn things back on so I won't have to see you naked anymore!"

Akira growled, "If you no wanna see me naked, then look the other way."

Mitsuru shook his head and glanced over at Nozomu, only to gasp in even more shock.

Nozomu had somehow gotten hold of one of the fan blades while the thing was spinning at full speed and was being carried around and around, laughing all the way.

"Nozomu, get down from there this minute! I mean it Nozomu, you'll be sorry if you don't listen to me! I'll make you sorry!"

The vampire only laughed harder, "Can't make me, can't make me! Won't come down, not at all! Not for long time!"

Mitsuru snarled and ran over to grab onto Nozomu's feet, "I said get down....AHHHHH!!!!!"

Mitsuru screamed as Nozomu's momentum carried him around the room with the drunken vampire, "NOZOMU!!! LET GO NOW!!!"

Nozomu laughed harder as his hands slipped from the fan and both members of the lunar race came crashing down.

Mitsuru impacted heavily with the dresser in the corner of the room. As the room went dark the last thought that went through his head was, 'I wonder if Misoka could help.'

Kit: There you go, enjoy the insane and pass it around. Sorry it's so short.


	3. Chapter 3

Kit: I'm back! Yeah!

Mitsuru: Good, get on with the fic.

Kit: Of course I own Crescent Moon, that's why I'm writing this fic. Not.

Mitsuru woke up slowly from his unintentional nap, "What hit me? WHERE ARE THEY?"

Akira came bouncing into the room with more energy than Mitsuru thought that anyone should have, "Mahiru gave us Pixy Stix! Isn't that the greatest thing you've ever heard?"

Mitsuru groaned, 'Great, now they're going to be drunk and hyper. How am I going to explain this to Oboro and Misoka? I'm not sure I want to be around when they come home.'

Mahiru ran into the room, bouncing as much as Akira, "This is so much fun! Nozomu and Akira traded me some of the drinks that they had for some of my Pixy Stix! Isn't that great Mitsuru?"

Before a reply could be made someone else butted in, "Yes, Mitsuru. Isn't this just wonderful. How is it that you seem to be the only one in the house not drunk?"

The tengu paled and whirled around, "Misoka! It's not my fault, I swear! I just wanted to know what the alcohol tasted like and then Nozomu and Akira drank it before I could and they broke my ceiling fan!"

The kitsune nodded, "You do know that you're going to be in trou-"

The last words that Misoka was going to say were suddenly lost in the large amount of sugar and alcohol that was being poured down his throat.

"You are hic going to hic be in big trouble." Already, a flush was growing across the Kitsune's face and he didn't seem to realize that he was starting to drink the alcohol that was being put in front of him.

Mitsuru slapped his forehead, "Why me, Goddess? Why do I have to put up with all the crazy people in the world? Why do they all seem to be gathered in this house? Why…. Misoka! Get down off the table and take that underwhere off your head! Whose underwhere is that?"

No one answered and the tengu quickly realized it was because they had all escaped out the window and into the outside world.

"Crap! How could I let this happen! Who knows what stupid messes they're going to get themselves into! Misoka! I said come down from there and give me that underwhere right now!"

The kitsune finally threw the underwhere at Mitsuru and ran out of the room, giggling the entire time.

**Mitsuru's attention was drawn quite suddenly away from Misoka to the T. V. and his eyes widened from what he saw.**

The news was on and on it was a very large, very drunk, and very hyper white wolf, prancing around happily in the middle of traffic.

The only thing running through Mitsuru's head as he ran out the door was, 'Never touching alcohol again as long as I live.

Kit: Very short but it's late and I have to go. I do hope you enjoy it even though this chapter is not as funny as I had hoped, it will get better.


End file.
